(excluding an abusive dangerous spouse) Nothing is more devastating to children than divorce. You can go through research after research and study after study, and the answer is always the same, divorce is absolutely devastating.
The point about the book by Alex Spanos, was that his parents made a choice to stay together, and further, made a choice to make home a priority and make it peaceable. Moreover, Alex in the book remarked how much he loved his parents for doing that for him and his brothers. I've heard similar stories myself, and how the children appreciated their parents for sticking it out for their sake.
You are thinking of parents that are yelling and screaming at each other, but that is a choice itself. You can choose to live with someone you don't like, and do so in a peaceful way. If the home is a cold-war zone, it is because one or both the parents are selfish and putting their wants and needs above that of the family. A hostile home is a choice, just like a peaceful loving home is a choice.
I suggest it is similar to work. In every work place, there's always that one or two people that drive you crazy. I have never met someone in the work place that didn't have at least one person that they just couldn't stand, yet they MUST work with them. How do they keep their jobs? How is there not hostility and strife? They make a choice. They choose to make their job a higher priority than their pride.
So why can't more people choose to make the home a higher priority than selfishness and pride? They can. The people of the past generation did. The people of our generation choose not to. That my friend, is all there is to it.
